


Chain Reaction

by 852_Prospect_Archivist



Category: The Sentinel
Genre: Angst, Drama, First Times, M/M, Song Lyrics
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-10
Updated: 2013-05-10
Packaged: 2017-12-11 06:39:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,312
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/794998
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/852_Prospect_Archivist/pseuds/852_Prospect_Archivist
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jim wakes up.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Chain Reaction

## Chain Reaction

by silvina

Standard Disclaimer. This makes more sense (than I do) if you read Motel 6 first. The song is If you're gone, by Matchbox Twenty. Please send comments, questions, compliments, and otters to sdelcul@yahoo.com.   


This story is a sequel to: Motel 6 

* * *

It was so loud; he could hear the hum of the refrigerator, the couple next door arguing about the phone bill, two cats fighting in the alley, - everything except Blair. He couldn't hear Blair because Blair wasn't there. Blair wasn't there and Blair had no hair. 

After swearing that he wouldn't cut his hair, he wouldn't get sucked in, Blair had surprised him by coming home with short hair. He couldn't say why that had been the final straw. After everything they'd gone through in the past few months a hair cut was rather minor. And suddenly he was mad and Blair was mad and he was yelling and Blair was yelling and then the door slammed behind Blair on his way out. 

I think I've already lost you   
I think you're already gone  
I think I'm finally scared now  
You think I'm weak - but I think you're wrong 

Fear based responses. The Subject. It had all been there in the dissertation, he just hadn't seen it coming. He'd actually believed that Blair might maybe kind of look up to him in a way. Clearly that had only been his wishful thinking. It turned out that Blair tolerated him and he admired Blair instead. Admired him for being brave when he didn't have the training and the muscles that Jim did. When he wasn't doing his job. A Sentinel had to risk his life; Blair should have been a scholar safe doing research in some library or teaching students to love Anthropology. 

I think you're already leaving  
Feels like your hand is on the door I thought this place was an empire  
But now I'm relaxed - I can't be sure 

It hadn't taken much convincing for him to let Blair stay with him after his apartment blew. It wouldn't have taken any actually, but he enjoyed hearing Blair beg and barter a place to live; how else could a week have become three years? And with Blair at the loft, it really had become his home, a place where he could relax, let his senses out. It wasn't like he had to fear a zone-out there. Blair would take care of him. 

I think you're so mean - I think we should try I think I could need - this in my life  
I think I'm just scared - I think too much I know this is wrong it's a problem I'm dealing 

All the noise is giving me a headache. Where are you? I can't do this by myself. I can't. 

If you're gone - maybe it's time come home There's an awful lot of breathing room  
But I can hardly move 

I should be happy to have the loft back to myself. Three years with a roomie who can't clean up after himself. Who knew you'd grow on me like fungus on one of your algae shakes? 

If you're gone - baby you need to come home Come home  
There's a little bit of something me   
In everything in you 

It's hard for me to trust people. Everyone lets you down in the end. My father always played games with Stevie and me. I can't even trust myself. When my partner was being murdered, I was off schtupping his girl. I need you to keep reminding me that some people aren't like that. You aren't like that. You gave up everything to protect me when I was being a jackass. 

I bet you're hard to get over  
I bet the room just won't shine 

I'm always half ready to believe you'll leave me. I know you will someday. Another research trip, one that you can't turn down, some girl, some criminal, some random natural disaster- I just go through each day hoping that it isn't today, or that I go first. 

I bet my hands I can stay here  
I bet you need - more than you mind 

I can't stay here. My head's going to explode if I can't turn off all the noise. I have to find you. I just need to know where you are. At all times. I just need to know where you are. 

I think you're so mean - I think we should try I think I could need - this in my life  
I think I'm just scared - That I know too much I can't relate that's a problem I'm dealing 

I can hear you. I tracked your car and your scent and your heartbeat. Lub dub. I'm so tired. Lub dub. So tired. Lub dub. I'm just gonna sit here and sleep. Lub dub. And in the morning, I'll drag you back to the loft. Lub dub. Back home. Lub dub. 

If you're gone - maybe it's time come home There's an awful lot of breathing room  
But I can hardly move 

What the- Damn, I must have dozed off- 

"Oh my God, Jim! Are you okay?" 

Man his heart's racing a marathon in there. I must have scared him. I'm such an idiot. He's afraid because of me. "I'm fine Sandburg." 

If you're gone - baby you need to come home Come Home  
'Cause there's a little bit of something me In everything in you 

"What are you doing here?" 

That doesn't even sound like Blair. He's got to be pissed at me. He opened his mouth to make up some excuse but the truth fell out. "I couldn't sleep." Wonderful, Ellison. That'll get him feeling all warm and fuzzy inside. 

"Why not?" 

And of course, any mention of the senses and, three, two- 

"Which sense was it? Hearing?" 

Bingo. 

"Should have been quiet last night without me moving around." 

"Too quiet." Did I say that outloud? 

"Huh?" 

I think you're so mean - I think we should try I think I could need - this in my life  
And I think I'm scared - do I talk too much? 

Shit. Uhm okay, how do I - "It was too quiet. I couldn't hear your heartbeat - I can always hear your heartbeat. Except when - " Good one, Ellison. Remind him of when he DIED. Whatever happened to not showing your feelings? He's going to think I'm just using him. "I'm sorry Sand - Blair. I'm really sorry." 

I know it's wrong it's a problem I'm dealing If you're gone - maybe it's time come home There's an awful lot of breathing room  
But I can hardly move 

His heart dropped when Blair turned around and walked back into the room, sitting on the bed. "I didn't mean-" 

"To say that or to be an ass yesterday?" 

Barely able to speak, he shrugged. "Both." 

If you're gone - baby you need to come home Come home  
There's a little bit of something me   
In everything in you 

The next thing he knew, he could barely breathe as he was pulled into a vice of a hug that he did his best to return, grateful that Blair had understood what he was trying to say. 

Something   
Everything in  
Something in you 

Tilting Blair's head up, he planned to apologize again, but as soon as their eyes met, he saw something that changed his mind. Still half expecting to be left alone, he brushed his lips over Blair's forehead. 

Blair froze. Jim opened his mouth to explain, but one look at Blair's face and he couldn't speak. Gently, he pressed another kiss to Blair's lips. 

"Let's go home, Jim." 

* * *

End Chain Reaction by silvina: sdelcul@yahoo.com

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